Rogue,
In my opinion, you are so not a Rogue, Instead you should be named Amie. Great friend. The news about Christina is new to Blog land but not so new to you. You had the strength to take the information you had, do some research, and confront Christina, begging her to prove you wrong.
Where you found the where with all to do this, I have no idea. How does one handle this new. For three years, you have been best friends with Christina. We all met on the network and the friendship was automatic. I will have to admit that I was jealous. Maybe because she was not an every day friend, you were able to share everything with her. She knows more about you than anyone, probably more than your husband. Probably the most devastating, especially as a mom, is that you had Christina stay at your house and get to know your kids. I would guess that a majority of your anger comes from that situation. 
I remember when my friend Sarah abandoned me and all of blogland. I was devastated/ But we were only friends for six months. I kind of know how you feel. How many others are not telling the truth? You may just want to leave Blogland. The hurt is so overwhelming that you can't even identify what emotion you are feeling. I felt so bad for you, I even had Ty talk to you on the phone. Which if others don't know, Ty has never spoken to anyone and really doesn't take part in any of my DD relationships. You never asked us to do so but I wanted you to know that you could trust me. And I know that you did because you shared what was going on while you were figuring out if Christina was real or not. We all wanted it to not be true.
Amie (I changed your name by the way), please know how much you are loved. I would wager that when others read Christina's blog, their first thought was for you. How are you doing? What can we do for you? Just as much as we love Christina, we love you. My heart is breaking, not just for me but for you. Please mourn with us, let us give you a shoulder to lean on. And know how much you are cared for. Not really an afterthought, but I think that we should also be aware that Chelsea from Learnng Domestic Discipline was also very close to Christina. Please, please pray for her and Clint.
I have to admit that I have been through something like similar to this. We love and want to help Christina BUT we also want to love and support Rogue. It is really okay to do both. You are not betraying either. I believe that there is so much love in our hearts that we can care for everyone.
Okay, not I am starting to cry. I so appreciate you, Ami, letting me be your friend and allowing me to share your pain. You are probably going to say something like I am hurting too. Shut up! This post is for you and only you. Lean on me.
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ReplyDeleteRogue, like Dana, you were first on my mind. I really hurt for you right now and have been praying. What a terrible blow after the year you've had. Please let your friends know when you need them.
ReplyDeleteAnd for the others hurt by the news of Christina, those named and those not, please know that you are in our prayers as well.
Many of us were blindsided by Christina's confession but none as much as those who knew her outside of blogland. It's a betrayal that will be difficult to forget, forgiving will be much easier. My heart goes out to you and I know that trust will be an issue in any new relationships you may form here but don't let it cripple you and change the way you are.
ReplyDeleteI'm stunned.
ReplyDeleteRogue ..As I said before, in private, that all of us who read Christina's blog have had posts pop up in our mind and thought, OMG that was a lie. I cannot fathom thinking that about phone conversations, texts, jokes, MEMORIES shared. I don't blame you if you want to walk away from all of this, and us. I just, selfishly hope that you will stay. We know it has been a difficult year for you. This could seem like the nail in the coffin. However knowing what I do of you you won't let it. You are a wonderfully strong, witty, woman. Someone I sincerely hope will be here for some time to come. When you are ready.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how you trust again. I don't know how this doesn't change you forever. I do know I have been through a situation like Blondie has mentioned above and it still pains me to this day. The vulnerability of oneself when in a Dd relationship and then sharing your inner soul with another only to have them be not who you thought is devastating. As Sunny said, the forgiving might be a lot easier than forgetting.
Well aren't I just a barrel of laughs.
Now my Blonde headed friend, you have shared your concern for your friends, let us be here for you too. I know you have Ty, but know we are here. I know you are hurting as well. Don't hide that from us. It is so wonderful that you are here for your friends but you don't have to hide behind your strength. If you need us, it is okay. Please reach out.
My love to you both
willie
I am still in shock I think. The first person I thought of was you, Rogue. I cannot imagine what you are feeling. I agree with what Betsy said, it has to feel like a death. I have been lucky enough to meet my own "Rogue". Betsy has become a part of my family. She knows I love her to death...and I know that you and C shared a similar bond. My heart has ached for you.... And for the others in her inner circle. May God hold you close in this difficult time.
ReplyDeleteRogue, I also thought of you first, and honestly I don't think an hour has passed since that I haven't thought of you. I simply have no words.
ReplyDeleteYou are in my prayers,
Betsy
Rogue, Sorry I am hijacking your blog to talk to Rogue, Blondie (I hope and I figured that would be okay). You are a strong woman and I am glad that you had the guts and where with all to investigate Christina when you had doubts. It is such a hard thing to suspect someone you call friend and even tougher when you find out they have been lying to you. Three years is a long time for a lie to last and it will take time to heal.
ReplyDeleteMy first thought was of you when I read Christina's blog and then I thought about everything else you've had to face this year and I just worried for you! I hope that you can heal from this betrayal and still be able to trust people here. I am about beyond words at how hurt I am for you and everyone else who was a "close" friend of "Christina". If you were instrumental in having her tell the truth, then I think you are even more awesome than I already though you were.
I don't know what will become of you and Christina, I know things can't be the same because the scars will remain, but honesty in a relationship, any relationship is more important. Blondie calls you Amie, but I think of you more as Chica, so I will close with don't let this keep you from everyone who cares about you. I know you like to be strong and handle things on your own, but it doesn't mean you're weak if you reach out to others, Chica.
Thank you Blondie for this lovely post to Rogue...sorry, just don't see her as Amie...a bit too delicate. ;) Sweet Rogue...my heart is breaking for you...as I told another friend, in many ways, this feels like a death because the Christina and family you knew are, for all intents and purposes, dead. I think you said it very well on Blondie's post yesterday when you referred to the stages of grief...you are going to have to mourn, just as we all are. One minute my heart is breaking for Christina and the next I am so hurt and confused I just stutter. Even though the 'facts' are fictitious, for my own sanity, I have to believe that Christina's sense of humor, playfulness, caring and loving personality are real. My feeling is that she started with a fib to fit in, thinking 'I don't know these people so no harm no foul' but then started making friendships, getting sucked further in...the more she cared, the more she feared losing you if the truth came out. Does this make it right...absolutely not but it does make it a bit more understandable to me.
ReplyDeleteI hope that for your sake you find a way to forgive her. I think you two have a lot to offer one another and if you can get past this (I know, not easy or simple but a lot of hard work), your relationship might actually be stronger. Sending lots of prayers, healing energy, positive thoughts and love. Please know that I am here if there is anything I can do to help you through this difficult time.
Hugs and Blessings...
Cat
*tears* You said what my heart is feeling a million times better than I ever could....
ReplyDeleteAgain thank you Blondie.
ReplyDeleteRogue...........when I got that something was seriously up in blog land and I read Christina's confession I was shocked. I am still shocked. A corner stone of blog land is fake. All of the stories keep swirling through my mind and realizing they were indeed just that, stories. I also thought of you, but for some reason not with concern. I believed you knew about this before the rest of us. It followed too soon after her visit to you. However my assumption was that she had confessed to you during that time and you had already had time to process it. While I am still shocked and today I am disgusted, what really hurts me is your pain. Now realizing that you had to dig for the information and then confront her.......reading what you wrote on Blondie's post yesterday.........I am so sorry Rogue. As Willie said, everything you and the others who were close to her shared with her, I can't even begin to imagine what all of you are going through right now. I wanted to reach out to you yesterday, but realized I didn't have your new e-mail. I have been away from blog land for a long while.
Again Rogue I am so so sorry and I wish I knew a way to ease your pain. Please know that I am sending you, Blondie, Cat and all who were close to her, all of my healing thoughts and prayers. Please...don't lose faith in the rest of us.
Hugs for you all,
Blue Bird
Once again expressing so much of what's in my heart. Thank you, sweet Blondie, and hugs.
ReplyDeleteAnd to Rogue, well, you already know. Hugging you from afar, my friend <3
Blondie, thank you for posting this. My heart goes out to you also.
ReplyDeleteRogue, my first thoughts were of you when I read Christina's post. I am still in shock and am so sorry for your pain snd can't begin to imagine what all those close to her must be going through. Please know we are here for you. Sending positive thoughts and prayers.
Hugs
Roz
Well, I just left a way too long comment on your last post so I won't repeat myself here...just want to say that my heart is with you Blondie, and Rogue and Dana and everyone else who is most affected by this whole situation.
ReplyDeleteBlondie thanks for these past two posts. You are really special and have handled this with real grace.
ReplyDeleteRogue, I thought of you right away and know you are reeling. Hopefully all these comments will help you to heal.
Blondie - I love this post in support of Rogue. I believe it is you, Rogue, Chelsea and the others mentioned on Christina's post - who are in need of support. They are the ones who are hurting most.
ReplyDeleteHere is a link to Rogue post about this: http://rougesawakening.blogspot.com/?zx=422130492635957b
Hi Blondie, I too thought of Rogue and how sad she must be at the moment. Rogue , if you are reading this, we are all here for you. Please reach out to us all
ReplyDeletelove Jan,xx
Blondie, what a tremendous post for your friend, Rogue. You are such a kind person to do this and I am certain she must appreciate it. Should either of you ever wish to speak to someone over here, who is very good at listening, you know where to find me. I know it must have shaken your trust in us all. I am so sorry and wish I could do something to help.
ReplyDeleteHugs
Ami
Well, honestly, I think have of the DD bloggers are fake. A lot of them are writers trying to drum up support for their DD fiction. Whackos.
ReplyDeletePlus, I remember when Christina wrote about her and Jim visiting Chelsea and Clint (remember the Cracker Barrel spanking) and Chelsea and Clint never said a word, so I think Chelsea and Clint are frauds too. How stupid are some of you people? Honestly, do you have to buy books from LDD to know how to spank your wife? Good Lord, grow up and quit being led around by these frauds who want your money. Think about it. What kind of man would 1) blog about DD to start with, and 2) be okay with his wife sharing their intimacy online. Wisen up!!
ReplyDeleteThere is no need for hateful words... The relationship between Christina and those she drew close to do not deserve hateful comments like everyone's a fraud.... You don't have to like Clint and Chelsea's choice to share thier lives and experience but don't call them frauds, just don't go in their site
ReplyDeleteNo room for hateful comments
Now to say thank you blondie I am not on line very often but I do try to talk to people occasionally and I send my love and prayers to everyone including Christina. Sit with your anger I respect that I am not sure how I would feel of it were my close friend I have a couple friends that I have been able to talk to on the phone and text with I can't imagine how I would feel if they came out and said it was all fake..,,
I understand the people who get into the sites because they are trolling for information to write smut but I feel this was different, I feel that Christina is lonely and sad and needed friends. Once she foun them she didn't want to let them go..,,
I send my love to you all and anonymous your a jerk..,,
I don't give a damn if you think I'm a jerk. Boo-hoo. The fact is Clint had "Jim" writing guest posts and talked about him like they were good friends. What the f*ck? If you fools want to keep having a big love fest over Clint, Chelsea, and Christina, then go ahead but hopefully some of you have had your eyes opened. P.S. Chelsea and Clint aren't "sharing" anything. They are "selling" something. Maybe some of your husbands can explain the big bad world to you and some of this drama will end (on the LDD blog post about this, the guy named Dave commenting is right). And Mr. B.B. Spanker tried to tell you all this a few years ago.
ReplyDeleteFunny that "anonymous" is the jerk when "Christina" lied for three years to everybody in this community and now deserves our sympathy. Well, no. She doesn't have mine and neither does Clint, who is full of drama in his own right and who should have been more responsible, not only with Chelsea but with all of those in the community he so desperately wants to lead. He sat "Jim" up as an ideal, even having him do a guest post, and then referred to him as a close friend. He filters comments on his blog so I'm putting them here. There are a lot of drama queens in the DD community. Blogging in general, I think, requires a personality that demands a certain amount of attention, so I guess all this moaning and groaning and "poor me" behavior is to be expected. Already, Rogue has written three blog posts on this issue. I guess she is wringing this for all the attention she can get. I've read all of your blogs for a while and got caught up in the make believe world. Never again.
ReplyDelete