Time to Reunite

DD is back in our lives.

Actually we "restarted" on Monday. And even though I was the one who withdrew consent, Ty was the one who said "enough, it is time to put our marriage back together." And since I wanted that too, that's how it went. As the HoH, it's Ty's role to be the one in charge.
As I mentioned in past posts, Ty has been really searching his sole and figuring out where this all went wrong. We were also working on rules for both of us. I hope that you understand that in a DD relationship, it is set up that there is one HoH and one Sub. Ty is the HoH at our house. Thus his rules are a little different and he doesn't have the same kind of punishment consequence as I do.
One major part of our relationship is that I have given him 51% and I have 49% on important decisions. That means I have all the say I want and he listens to me and really considers my opinion. But in the end, he has the final say. Luckily for us, there has only been one time that we both disagreed upon something and he used his final say. I was unhappy but I am not allowed to pout or continue arguing. This helps us because it stops us from both trying to be the one in charge. It just didn't work. He listens to me, he backs me up, he doesn't ridicule me (especially in front of the kids) and we can really communicate better.
Let me give you an example of the rules we made for Ty. And this is based on our experience and some have changed over the years
1. Do not tease or make fun of me, especially in front of kids. Must apologize to kids in you do this.
2. No false threats
3. Must always listen to my point of view before making final decision that is good for the household
The other rules have to do with Ty being honest and caring, setting a good example, being trustworthy and respectful, and that kind of stuff.
My rules aren't so much rules as they are guidelines, I guess I can call them rules too. But these rules
are set up to make me a better person. The help to make me be submissive and obedient.
We are a team. he leads and I follow. He is help accountable for his actions to God and to me. And I am held accountable to him. And when needed, he spanks me.
The first spanking, after he decided we were doing DD again was a role affirmation. A way to reestablish rules and to get back on track. I wasn't punished for withdrawing consent. No he thanked be for that. But it was our way to reconnect.
I want to thank all of you for your support during this painful time. Ty really appreciated what you said as it helped him realize the errors of his way. It would really be terrible to throw away three great years of marriage through DD. Twenty-four years we have been married. Our life has been a roller coaster. DD has helped us.