Sick and Grouchy

This has been a real tough week for me. I have just been out of sorts. I woke up with a head cold Monday morning and everything went downhill from there. I honestly have to say, I think that my husband gets mad at me when I am not feeling well. He says that he doesn't but that he wishes I would take better care of myself.  I just want to tell him to get real, there is no rest for the weary. He has just frustrated me all week. He has pushed all my buttons and because I am already not feeling well, I get myself all riled up and end of getting spanked. I think that I got at least one spanking a day this week - and most of the time I was being provoked by him. Grrrrrr. 

Well I really lost it on Friday. B has every other Friday off and this was his off one. I love spending time with him and I had been looking forward to this day since the last Friday he had off. Well between having workers in our house destroying our extra bathroom and my teenagers whining to him about this and that, things went downhill fast. For the first time since we have begun domestic discipline, I actually told him to  "F--K OFF". He looked at me and started laughing and said that he was glad that I got it out of my system and he couldn't wait to spank me for it later. I was so mad at him. I kept my mouth shut at least but things were rather tense for awhile. I actually emailed my friend Sarah and told her what happened. I didn't expect that she would read my email that day or over the weekend but I had to vent and she is my spanking friend that I actually talk to. Well she emailed me back and she was all over my case. And told me that I was in the wrong and that I better make it up to my husband. I think that she threw back all of my words that I used when lecturing her. Dang! But all in all, it was good to hear from someone who shares the lifestyle that no matter what, I handled the situation wrong. I did apologize while being spanked - over and over. And we did talk more about his demeanor when I am sick.

But unfortunately, things for me did not return back to how they were. I believe that he said that I was being defensive, that I was being rude to him and not treating him with respect. What? Me? Maybe I was but I was still frustrated. B was getting on to me about the baseball uniforms not being all together (hats, belts, shoes, cups, jersey, etc). Now my kids are old enough to be responsible for their own things. I figure as long as they are washed and given to the child, well then he better keep track of where he puts it. The boys are 10 and 12. B thinks that I should have everything laid out the night before so we are not looking, last minute, for a cleat or a hat. I have fallen asleep early every night this week, the sinus cold got worse before it got better. And I told the boys to take of their stuff. And then I went to bed. Yeah, you guessed it..... one boy couldn't find his cup and the other one couldn't find a sock and his hat. And their games were at the same time, so they couldn't borrow each other's either. So my husband, who can find anything, decides to make us all sweat it out, looking for these items. And when we are late, I get a little frantic. Especially when the boys get distracted from looking because the TV is on. So my husband mentions something to me about how he always says that we should make sure everything is ready the night before. And, again, I lost it. Another brutal spanking, thank you very much.

And today was not a whole lot better for me. One of the boys had another game today (a makeup) and not only did I have to wash his uniform (90 degrees on Sat.) but my husband lets him sleep over at a friends house so I am stuck looking for the clothes that he was wearing and had taken off in different rooms. This morning, the hat was missing. I was trying to pack the cooler and the kids had used up the ice cubes and had not refilled them. And I was being peppered  with questions from the other kids about when will I get home, and if they could have a ride, or what could they eat.... ). My husband was outside washing the vehicles, ignoring all of the commotion. And when he made the comment to me, as I was walking past him, about making sure that everything was laid out the night before, I DID NOT TELL HIM WHERE TO GO, I just bit my tongue and told him that I would meet him there. And off I went with my ballplayer and his brother and sister. I told the other two boys to ask their dad about rides and money. They are teenagers and had just woken up.

After the game, my tone of voice and my attitude were not the best. And once again, even though I tried really hard, I got spanked. We had to be quiet so he is experimenting and used a plastic hanger and the wooden spoon. We haven't really tried these implements. The first time he spanked with the spoon, it didn't hurt at all because, apparently, he hadn't wanted to accidentally swing too hard. Since it didn't hurt, we never tried it again. The last and only time he used the hanger, I hate it because it felt like the handle was hitting my tail bone. And this happened twice today. If I am not careful, it will probably happen again before I go to bed.

I sure hope that a good nights sleep will bring back my husband - the one who leads, who helps, who calms and who doesn't provoke me. I also hope that in the morning I will have returned to my nice and submissive self who doesn't tell him where he can go. The workers will return but I feel much better.

Oh by the way, my husband just asked for some loving and I unfortunately responded that if he wanted any of that, he better tie me up because I am just not feelin it.

He told me that I should let my blog friends know how submissive that I am being.  What?

Hope for the best.